On today’s installment of Trends We Miss, we lament the phenomenon of rock bands titling themselves after a common place name. These generic, boring band names seem to have gone by the wayside in favor of nonsensical words like “Menomena” and “Spoon,” or clusters of familiar words that create new, puzzling phrases like “The Arcade Fire” or “The Radio Heads.”

O, for the days of lame, uninteresting bands names! You know what I’m talking about.

Chicago.
Boston.
Kansas.
Europe.
Asia.
Alabama.
Motherfuckin’ America, yo.

And there are so many untapped possibilities! Imagine if bands continued to do this. We could have bands with names like Albany! Or New Rochelle! Or Las Vegas! Or Darfur! Or Tropic of Capricorn! Or Beirut!…. well, scratch that last one.

(Seriously, though, can you believe a band actually had the audacity to call themselves Chicago? And wasn’t there a band called Oregon? Were they actually from Oregon? The balls. The fucking nerve.)