In honor of the-band-that-shall-remain-nameless who just sent me a press packet that included two images—one in front of a brick wall, and the other on train tracks—I think it’s time we discuss the art of promotional band photography.

I’m pretty accepting of all band photos—and I’m much kinder than the dreaded Hall of Douchebags gallery—but a backdrop of a brick wall, and/or railroad tracks, is just damn inexcusable.

But instead of the lecture, let us focus on the positive, the photos that work. For instance, this A.C. (Carl) Newman photo:

Now this is a great, and totally ridiculous, image. How could you not be fascinated by the simplicity, charm, and mystery—Who the hell is she? Why does he have that stunned look on his face? Are they meeting for the first time? Why the woods?—of this photo? I don’t think we’ll ever find out.

Tomorrow, we examine how to properly take a black metal band photo.
For reals.