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Monday, September 21, 2009

Win Tickets to The Killers

Posted by Ezra Ace Caraeff on Mon, Sep 21, 2009 at 11:07 AM

killers.jpg

Oh please, stop trotting around on your indie rock high horse and admit that—deep down—you just want to do nothing but listen to commercial radio, wear JJ Casuals ("The shoes that look like feet!"), and go see the Killers when they perform at Memorial Coliseum this Thursday. While we can't help with the first two, we do have a couple pairs of tickets to see the Killers that are yours for the taking.

The best comment below on why you deserve to attend this show will win two tickets. Comments must be posted by Tuesday at 5pm. Good luck.

 

Comments (16) RSS

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1
Because my mustache is faaaaar better than any of those asshats.
Posted by Oregometry on September 21, 2009 at 11:19 AM · Report
2
I deserve to win the tickets because my "best" friend bought me a ticket and then gave it to someone else. In other words, I got dissed. Also, I would totally cut a lock of my curly hair off and paste it on like a mustache, since my quite female face can't actually grow one on it's own.
Posted by oregonkj on September 21, 2009 at 11:21 AM · Report
3
I deserve to win because The Killers want me to be there even through they won't return my emails and keep changing their phone number. As long as the seats are more than 50 feet from the stage, I am good to go.
Posted by Tony Fuentes on September 21, 2009 at 11:41 AM · Report
4
As can be attested to by any number of the moustache-ride recepients from the previous Mercury Presents "Bad Movie in a Parking Lot" Event, I do in fact have the best moustache of any of the /b/town commenters.

Also... I FUCKING KNOW HOW TO SPELL "MOUSTACHE"!!! That travesty of a spelling without the 'o' is for fucking mongoloid sodomites. Also, mongoloid with a lower-case 'm' refers to sufferers of Down's Syndrom and not towards an outdated phrase for Asians. Why am I even writing anymore? Ezra, give me some free shit!
Posted by Graham on September 21, 2009 at 11:52 AM · Report
5
Because I got caught in the Produce Row area train tracks while riding my bike home from dinner, and broke my left forearm in half. Seriously, it was crooked, and for a few minutes there was fear that the blood flow to my fingers was cut off, though fortunately it wasn't. I spent half of the weekend in the hospital, waiting for surgery to repair my snapped bones, but kept a sense of humor and even called into work, while on morphine, to explain my absence.

As you might guess, I haven't been able to have any fun, let alone go to a show in a club, for fear my fragile pinned together arm will be torn in half by a stumbling drunks, so seeing a show in a nice big coliseum, with over-priced beers and actual seats, would awesome.

Also, my wife and I both really enjoy the Killers, and we aren't too hip to admit it.

To recap:

1. I broke my fucking arm, in half.
2. I might have a dreadfully huge hospital bill (even with insurance).
3. I really like the Killers.
Posted by luckymike on September 21, 2009 at 12:06 PM · Report
6
I am trying to figure out if I am just dating someone, or we are just friends.

I think taking them to this show could do the trick.
Posted by mulderc on September 21, 2009 at 1:03 PM · Report
7
I deserve these tickets.

1) I too know how to spell moustache properly. Even better I know how to spell Down's syndrome.

2) I have a better moustache from those dudes in the killers and the guys that have commented before me.

3) This is a perfect opportunity to hock my new album to the Killers.

http://hphotos-snc1.fbcdn.net/hs227.snc1/7…

4) (Note: Winner is required to wear tight white pants and grow a rape 'stache.)
Done
http://photos-b.ak.fbcdn.net/photos-ak-snc…

5) I like the Killers.

6) Here's a picture of wishbone as Robin Hood.

http://a139.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/image…

7) I won't stop putting up half naked pictures until I get some tickets... It's your choice my friend...
Posted by Joe Joe on September 21, 2009 at 1:23 PM · Report
8
I don't really deserve the tickets, so I'm not gonna make up some bullshit reason about why you need to pick me. But I haven't been to a good show in a long damn time and would dig an excuse to get outta the house and be late to work Friday. :D

Or, if that isn't good enough, I bet I could do a really good Donkey (from Shrek) impersonation.

(as an afterthought, i realize that I totally just made up a BS reason after I just said I wasn't gonna. But I'm fully aware of my hypocrisy and wallow in it with delight.)
Posted by Flaim on September 21, 2009 at 4:02 PM · Report
9
Because I'm bonerific!
Posted by Nap34 on September 21, 2009 at 4:55 PM · Report
10
Look, I'm happy for you all, and I'mma let you finish, but my reason for wanting the tickets is the best of the year.
Posted by jrmouton on September 21, 2009 at 5:31 PM · Report
11
Because I dreamt that Saint Michael Jackson descended from heaven and told me these words as he was dancing on the head of a safety pin on my Utili-kilt: "I'm a lover, not a Killer"...then he whispered to me that my moustache might "tickle" him, and also could I get him some "Jesus Juice" whatever that means. And then I told him that as I moonwalked away from him that I knew that a band called the Killers has gotta have Jesus Juice lying around, WTF ! Then I woke up.
Posted by Bone Gypsy on September 21, 2009 at 5:57 PM · Report
12
I deserve these tickets because I have entered EVERY SINGLE 94/7 entry EVER!!!! Without ever winning a single one. Not even a 94/7 nation supporter. Come on guys, cut a girl some slack.
Posted by Dancing_Cavalier on September 21, 2009 at 6:09 PM · Report
13
I deserve these tickets. This summer, I became obsessed with Mormonism, particularly hipster Mormons. Seriously. I don't get it. When I see skinny jeans and buffalo plaid, I wonder if they're tithing and hating gays. If I could go to this show for free, I would reach the apex of my fascination.
Posted by anne on September 21, 2009 at 9:09 PM · Report
14
That bitch Brandon Flowers deflowered my virgin 'stache-rock soul and never let me see him do it live. It'll be like the pop version of a Thai Ping-Pong show for me.
Posted by Microfoam on September 21, 2009 at 11:05 PM · Report
15
"He felt paralyzed, he wanted to sleep inside her lungs and breathe her blood and be smothered."

Who knew that Tim O'Brien knew my exact feelings for the Killers?
Posted by gigicary on September 21, 2009 at 11:42 PM · Report
16
I deserve these tickets because I too have a moustache, and get made fun of, because I'm a chick. Please give me tickets so that my chick-stache and I can one-up the facial hair haters, and go see OUR favorite band!
Posted by abroman on September 22, 2009 at 12:20 PM · Report

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