Yesterday James Burns put this pitch up on the Point (a fundraising site, it's a little like Kickstarter). So far he's raised $12.00 and gotten two tweets, one from drummer Patrick Wilson saying, "If they can make it to 20, we'll do the 'deluxe breakup!'" and one from a less amused Rivers Cuomo saying, "They must get a lot of hits when they write crap about us." Oh, Rivers, maybe if a half Japanese girl had written it you'd be a little less sensitive.

THE PITCH:

I have never been a fan of this band. I think that they are pretty much horrible, and always have been. Even in the early 90’s. But this isn’t about me. This is about the Weezer fans. They are our brothers and sisters, our friends, our lovers. Every year, Rivers Cuomo swears that he’s changed, and that their new album is the best thing that he’s done since “Pinkerton,” and what happens? Another pile of crap like “Beverly Hills” or “I’m Your Daddy.” This is an abusive relationship, and it needs to stop now. I am tired of my friends being disappointed year after year. I am tired of endless whimsical cutesy album covers and music videos. I’m sick of hearing about whatever this terrible (and yes, even if you like the early stuff, you should be able to admit that they are wretched now) excuse for a band is up to these days.

If all 852,000 of you (really?) who bought “Pinkerton” pitch in $12, we will meet our goal.

I beg you, Weezer. Take our money and disappear.

If I had it my way, they would have made these two and STOPPED.

up-10weezer.jpg

End Hits: We'll also go away for $10 million. Seriously.